At a crowded press conference today the Tee times for  2025 Portugal Tour were announced.

“After much deliberation and frustration, some heartbreak and gnashing of teeth, I can announce the 2025 Portugal Tee Times.

It is true to say that apart from the Big K Shorrocks posse we have no idea who will actually be playing but it is early days and these appearance money negotiations can be tiresome and lengthy, but we will persevere !” said global Tournament Executive Leader Clive “Hoppy” Dearsley.

So far we are close to confirming Mick R, Chilly, Nigel (Obviously) and Myself but elsewhere the regular tour players are in various states of repair with bits dropping off or new bits being sewed on (full details available on Medical Golf.com), but developments will be announced right here as they happen !”

2025 Portugal Tee Times. 

(All complaints, suggestions or unnecessary abuse should be kept to oneself or better still written on a post card to Mr V Putin, Kremlin, Russia)