The PGA today revealed the 2018 Portugal Tour tee times. Following on from the controversial 2017 “Night Golf” fixtures,  secretary Hoppy Dearsley commented :

“Look last year was really not a problem, everyone was supplied with torches, and in some cases compasses and miners helmets, I really don’t know what the fuss was all about, we did’nt loose anyone did we ?

Oh yes, but we found Monty eventually, obviously in a hedge but he was happy, wasn’t he ?”

Leader of the “Daylight Only” Golf group Sir Micheal King was adamant:

“Any tee time after 7.30 am is a sin ! As written in Caddies versus 9 -17 “Thou shalt not play golf in the afternoon you twat !”  Nuff said as far as I am concerned.”

 Nigel Carby recently rebuilt international man of mystery summed up the situation:

“Look you get on a plane , you play golf, you drink beer, you come home. Anything else is a bonus or in my case very confusing.”

 

The 2018 Tee Times in Full:

Tuesday 8th May – Pinhal – 12.34 pm

Wednesday 9th May – Laguna – 12.50 pm

Thursday 10th May – Vila Sol – 10.57 am

Saturday 12th May – Silves – 11.42 am

Sunday 13th May – Pinta – 11.42 am

Monday 14th May – Millennium – 10.21 am